Nat Torkington lines up in the next of our speaker interviews. There’s some very quotable stuff here!

Webstock: You’ve made the move from the the hotbed of Silicon Valley to, well, let’s just say when Warkworth is the nearest big town you’ll be looking hard to find yourself on Google maps. Why the move?

Nat Torkington: I grew up here, first and foremost, and wanted my kids to have the same kind of upbringing that I had. It’s expensive to buy a house in the country and live close to the beaches, the sea, and farmland. My kids may never be able to afford to do it. So I felt I should give them those experiences while they’re young, before they have to pay for it all themselves. And I missed home 🙂

It’s also wonderful to have distance, literal and emotional, between Silicon Valley and myself. It’s easy, when you live there, to buy into the bubble. From this side of the world, idiocy is easier to see. There are drawbacks, of course – it’s considerably more difficult to evaluate from afar the applicability of a product to the US market.

Webstock: Which four people, living or dead, would you have at your ultimate dinner party?

Nat Torkington: Oscar Wilde, W.H. Auden, Douglas Adams, and my great-great-grandfather. The first three are all writers I admire: witty, insightful, interested in diverse things, and with nanometer-precision language skills. All have travel, exile, and dislocation in their stories: Wilde fell from grace in London society and was exiled to France, Auden rejected England for New York, and even Douglas Adams moved from his famed Islington flat to Los Angeles.

My gggf would have an amazing story to tell. He was a builder in Manchester, and we have stories of him doing handstands on the chimney stacks of factories. He and his wife lost seven young kids to the ills of Industrial Age Victorian England before she died in childbirth, leaving him with only three living sons. He went from Manchester to America, South Africa, and New Zealand, then returned to New Zealand to buy land (walking from Auckland to Leigh then Mangawhai before walking back and saying “I’ll take Leigh”) and then moved his sons out. It’s astonishing to think of the state of mind of someone in that circumstance – the sadness, the vulnerability, the strength, the determination to provide and survive. I’d gladly foresake conversation with the other three just for a dinner with the first Torkington in New Zealand.

Webstock: If programming languages were religions, what religions would Perl, Ruby on Rails and .Net be?

Nat Torkington: Python would obviously be Catholicism: there’s only one way to do it, that’s our way to do it, and if you try to find another then you deserve to burn in hell. Perl is hippy new age 1970s spirituality: a hodgepodge of angels, Tibetan monks, whalesongs, animism, meditation, and underground cities. Even though Perl practitioners sometimes seem crazy to outsiders, they’re still calm and productive. Ruby on Rails is the efficiency religion of the 2000s, as exemplified by Getting Things Done. It looks practical and efficient on the surface, and everyone raves about it, but look too close and you realize it’s the same hippy bullshit as Perl but with great marketing and positioning.

.NET is Scientology: bullshit manufactured to profit from the gullible.

Webstock: Teh Interwebs – what more should New Zealand be doing as a country?

Nat Torkington: This question comes up a lot and for a long time I struggled to find an answer. Now I believe there isn’t one, because this is an invalid question. New Zealand doesn’t act as a country. There’s government policy, there’s business behaviour, there’s education, there’s consumer sentiment. There’s no one answer that works for “New Zealand as a country”.

The open question is whether a Kiwi can build an Internet product that attracts consumers overseas. It appears, at first glance, that you have to be in the market, be in the same environment as your customers, to create a killer product. So the whole Knowledge Wave drama of living in NZ but making a killing overseas could well be a pipedream. It’d certainly explain why, as David Skilling points out, our top 10 exports are the same now as they were in the 80s.

Xero and several other companies are hoping to score well internationally while still keeping their core operations in NZ. I wish them luck – I know they’re learning a lot about the challenges of doing this. I hope fervently they can find a way through for the rest of us.

If it turns out that you have to be embedded in local markets to succeed, that might be an opportunity for the Kiwi exodus. We have the number 8 wire mentality behind us – generalists, ingenious, used to doing more with less – so as our brightest find themselves overseas they may see opportunities. The trick is relating that to those of us back in New Zealand! We can’t compete with China on price for manufacturing. Software might well go that way, too.

I have some thoughts on what might work for us, but I’ll save those for my talk!

Webstock: You’ve attended and organised more conferences than most of us have had hot dinners. What makes for a good conference?

Nat Torkington: The best part of every conference is the hallway track – the people you run into between talks, the people you talk with at lunch, the people you go drinking with after sessions end for the day. A good conference enables and encourages these off-the-grid interactions rather than attempting to channel everything through the formally-planned sessions. A great conference is one that has attracted fascinating, diverse, talkative people as attendees, so everyone you talk to is exciting and enlightening.

Webstock: Which other Webstock speaker are you most looking forward to seeing, and why?

Nat Torkington: Don’t make me choose! I know Kathy, Damian, Tom, Simon, Russell, and Amy already. I’m a big fan of Dan Cederholm’s designs, so I’ll be trying hard to pick up even a skerrick of his talent while he’s here. But I think it’s Tom Coates I’m most looking forward to. When I think back to the presentations on web technology that have blown my mind in the last ten years, Tom’s name crops up again and again. I’m thinking of the BBC Program Information Pages [and PDF presentation], and Using Wikipedia to Give Structure to Flat Lists. If you haven’t read his Native to a Web of Data talk, do so. Similarly, Greater than the Sum of Its Parts is simultaneously mind-expanding and useful.

We overworked dispensers of Webstock 08 scholarships have now received all applications and are about to start reading, thinking and plugging our formula with its 37 secret components into the decision spreadsheet.

We will reveal our decisions soon. Promise.

Meanwhile … if anyone can offer any scholarship funding please let us know — we have heaps of excellent applicants who deserve a chance.

In the second of our speaker interviews, we caught up with Amy Hoy, globetrotting in Vienna!

Webstock: Ok, so describe a typical day at work for Amy Hoy?

Amy Hoy: That’s a tough one. My days are really varied!

A typical day “at work” in the past few months would almost indubitably find me somewhere other than home, quite likely in Europe. My partner John and I have been travelin’ fools lately. Inconstancy of location has been the most constant thing for me in the past few months. (Case in point: I’m in Vienna right now.)

While trying to resist the delights of whatever foreign place I find myself in, I’ll be fielding calls and emails with clients, working on sketches and diagrams, trying to get inside the heads of the audience for the product I’m working on (and sometimes trying to help the client determine what the heck the product is to start with). Preferably not in that order, since there’s something about contact with other humans that I find irresistibly distracting.

Some days I don’t even need to touch a computer other than to do research on a topic (for example, the relative success of various file representation metaphors), working almost exclusively on paper. Other days, things are less conceptual and I spend all day in Photoshop and OmniGraffle, only coming out of my designer-coma to wipe the drool from my mouth and fetch another [insert local caffeinated beverage of choice].

Our conceptual work often involves a mix of early stage product design, marketing and positioning, and selecting feature sets in addition to the actual nuts and bolts of interface and interaction design and, finally, visual design (and sometimes implementation)… so there’s always enough to keep me occupied.

I haven’t written much code in the past few months but I’m getting back into the swing of it for an upcoming project. I’m excited.

Webstock: The cowboy hat. Will it be travelling to New Zealand with you?

Amy Hoy: It probably won’t! Sadly. It’s a $3 K-Mart special and I doubt it could make the journey alive.

The now-famous “Amy Hoy” cowboy hat was originally worn (and spraypainted red) by one of the organizers of FOSCON (Free Open Source Convention) in 2006, when the theme was Ruby Rodeo. Their “street team” wore those hats around non-free OSCON in the evening so we could know where to hitch a ride to FOSCON (because, let’s face it, geeks in red cowboy hats stand out in a crowd). One of the guys jokingly plopped it on my head and, in my obnoxiousness, I asked if I could keep it. I think he was a bit surprised by my gall and therefore shocked into saying “Yes.”

Otherwise, I’m not much of a hat person.

I will be bringing my blue-and-green hair, though. It’s easier to transport.

Webstock: I’ve got a Blackberry. It’s new, I’m still getting to know it, but I do like it. Should I be worried that you’re coming to New Zealand?

Amy Hoy: Yes. I may appear to be completely in love with my iPhone, but a girl can’t help her wandering eye. I’m a famous device lothario.

So… what’s your Blackberry’s sign?

Webstock: Who’s had the most influence on you as a designer, and why?

Amy Hoy: That’s also really tough question… or possibly I’m just a wuss about interviews.

I’ve mimicked all sorts of other peoples’ styles over the years, and I’ve certainly learned new techniques that way, but I’d have to say that the people who most influence me in design aren’t actually designers, but more along the lines of worldly philosophers. People who have taught me how to really see, think and question, rather than any particular visual or usability tactic. And especially people who have taught me how to understand people.

Once I pop I can’t stop… I can’t pick just one. I’m totally schizophrenic with what I like and I can never name a single favorite book or movie, either—and people are so much more complicated than that!

I’d have to include such people as Thomas Frank, Daniel Pinker, Pema Chodron, Daniel Goleman, Desmond Morris, Franz de Waal, Seth Godin, Daniel Gilbert, Kathy Sierra, Robert Wright, Neil Gaiman, Roger von Oech, Brenda Laurel, Douglas Hofstadter, Henry Petroski, Wil Wright, and Don Norman (ok, he’s a designery person).

These people have all had a huge impact on me through their writing and speaking, although the list could go on much longer than that, even.

Webstock: Aside from Webstock, is there anything you’re particularly looking forward to while visiting New Zealand?

Amy Hoy: The scenery, the people, the beef — it all sounds great. I won’t mind missing the ickiest month of the year back in Maryland, either. And I think we’re going to pop over to Australia a little bit, too, although that might be wishful thinking based on the schedule.

Webstock: Which other Webstock speaker are you most looking forward to seeing, and why?

Amy Hoy: You just like putting me on the spot, don’t you? And I’ve been told that New Zealanders are such nice people!

If you pressed me, I would have to say Scott Berkun. His books and blog have been a big inspiration for me—which I can also say for at least half the other speakers!—and he’s also situated next to me on the speaker list page, so he’s obviously the clear winner.

In the first of our speaker interviews, Webstock talked with Michael Lopp.

Webstock: Can you tell us a little about what you do at Apple?

Michael Lopp: Apple is famous for it’s secrecy, so I’m going to answer this question via a haiku:

When changing the world
Yes, sleeping is optional
A long time coming

Webstock: Is Fake Steve Jobs on your blogroll?

Michael Lopp: He is, but he’s less entertaining than the real thing.

Webstock: A developer tells you it’s going to take 4 hours to complete a task. How long will it really take?

Michael Lopp: A developer who provides a 4 hour estimate is working for a micromanager who is driving his employees crazy by trying to control the minutiae of software development. For this scenario, I would triple the estimate and then round up to the nearest day. If there was a weekend nearby I’d another day for good measure. I’d also schedule a walk-around-the-building meeting with the manager who is asking for sub-day estimates where I’d tell him to chill out.

Webstock: The Rands Vegas system – wisdom hard-earned?

Michael Lopp: By my estimate, the Rands Vegas System has cost me $21,782 over twenty years. It’s important to note that this does not include intangible costs of both the brain and liver damage which I’ve incurred as well as the decreased lung capacity due to chain smoking while in Vegas. It’s also important to note that I consider those costs to relatively cheap when compared to wisdom I’ve gained from the fantastically bizarre people I’ve met at 5am at the poker table at Bally’s casino after two days of no sleep.

Webstock: Aside from Webstock, what else are you looking forward to in New Zealand?

Michael Lopp: Two of my passions, surfing and wine, have an odd common trait: goofy names. Surfers are renown for giving bizarre names to surf spots. Wine makers do the same with their wines. It is my mission while in New Zealand to ascertain via a statistically valid sample of both surf spots and wine makers to determine whether this trait applies to all hemispheres equally.

Webstock: Which other Webstock speaker are you most looking forward to seeing, and why?

Michael Lopp: After staring at the speaker list two nights, I’m finding myself mentally thrashing on picking a single speaker. There are too many amazing speakers. Therefore, I will tell you that I’m curious about a conference which has both morning and afternoon tea as part of the official schedule. Are tea cups going to be provided? Is there pinky etiquette that I need to follow? Also, I see on the program there are two secret sessions. This clever marketing ploy has also piqued my interest.

For your aural pleasure, we’re dang excited to add two top class, stunningly dressed and uber talented musical acts to the star studded Webstock ’08 line up: Twinset, and Wellington International Ukulele Orchestra (WIUO).

Be soothed and boogalooed by Twinset’s sexy summery soul jazz at Thursday evening’s Cocktail Funk-tion, and thrilled and fulfilled as WIUO strum sing-a-long favourites and blazing solos at Friday’s Post Match Shindig.

To get you in the mood, dear reader, here’s Hey Ya performed by the Orchestra at Cabaret on YouTube:

Webstock: quite possibly the coolest web conference like, ever.